AOKO OTIENO: Dear men, you attract leeches when you define yourself by your possessions

Broke men are to Kenyan women what lepers were to the Biblical Jews. The general notion (perceived or real) is that a typical Kenyan woman who has used YouTube tutorials to learn how to apply mascara and has an accent acquired from watching ratchet series like Love and Hip-hop wouldn’t want to be there as you build and would rather have you as a finished or almost finished product.

The current crop of women want the final thing and are not willing to put in the work to build a man as he builds himself. But have men actually thought that they are enablers of this mentality?

I have had a good number of men show up in my inboxes flaunting not their wherewithal but some lousy possessions like hectares of land in Kitale. Never mind that the particular guy could barely spell hectares.

Guys, do not blame her if she’s only interested in your money -not if you’re the one defining yourself by your possessions.

It is catastrophic that this generation of men chases after money in order to chase women. Then he gets women who love his money but they in turn merely just tolerate him.

One of the life’s greatest tragedies of manhood is that men’s first instinct is to refuse to listen to their instinct, instead, they tend to assuage their brittle egos more and listen to the dangling oracle with a shrine between their thighs. Any man who substitutes the work of Oblongata with that of the phallus deserves whatever comes his way. Don’t get me wrong, there are times when it is appropriate to think with it, but 98% of the time that men use it to think, is often inappropriate.

Most of the time you deserve the kind of women you end up with. The messages you send out gets you who you end up with. Many guys will meet a beautiful girl in a club, wearing the shortest skirt, and think she must be easy. Meanwhile, she’s on the lookout for a dude who will splash out the most money on her for the night. Later, he realizes that he was taken for a ride, but didn’t get the ride he was hoping for.

If you think that by flashing your wallet you will get a great woman, the one you really need, then you have a broken wallet and heart coming. You will label all women as selfish, greedy female dogs (hey mama, I did not use the word bitch, yay!)

Show women your brain, not your wallet. Your heart, not your credit card. If she can’t accept your brain, then she doesn’t deserve your wallet. That’s the way it should be. If you show her the wallet, then she is in love with it not you. If you get treated like an ATM machine, it’s not her fault, it’s yours for allowing your junior member below the belt to do all your thinking for you. You are a sissy piece of shit if you cannot rely on your charm, humor and charisma to woo a woman.

I have negligible regard for old white men- except Sanders Bernie and Uncle Biden, well and a few more. But one old and immorally rich white man said something that all this generation must grasp more than they sing along to lyrical sewage like Cardi B’s WAP. The old wealthy chap is George Soros who said:

“Unsure of what they stand for, people increasingly rely on money as the criterion of value. What is more expensive is considered better … People deserve respect and admiration because they are rich. What used to be a medium of exchange has usurped the place of fundamental values, reversing the relationship postulated by economic theory. What used to be professions have turned into businesses. The cult of success has replaced a belief in principles. Society has lost its anchor.”

We define character by how much someone has and the kind of cars they drive, you use your possession in order to get a certain kind of woman and try hard to flaunt material things to impress people we don’t even like! What’s the point?

If you lured a woman with your wallet instead of your personality, if she likes your stuff more than she likes you, then she is not a gold-digging farm tool, she’s doing what you taught her to do. A real man will be confident in who he is, not what he has. If he happens to have money, power and everything else, that’s a bonus.